Reflection

     

Sometimes I ask myself a lot of questions..questions I get no answers to.Rhetorical question, I guess..
I woke up this morning with an agenda of words I'm definitely going to render.
if u've never failed, u can never know d true impact of success. if u've never been blind you definitely won't know what it means 2see and if u've never lost a friends, you will never get 2knw d value of having one genuine friend close 2u.
Poverty isn't lack of money but lack of everything but money. Like victims, we lay helpless blaming others 4our recklessness. But ur responsible 4every outcome of YOU right from d start..it's high time u quit dreaming and give ur bed a world class vacation. We all gats gifts but we must discover ourselves and I promise we can b d most fascinating legend we've ever dreamt of. However, success is never going 2mak sense until u learn 4rm ur failed past cos dats d point where u see ur obstacles as a stepping stones,misery as miracles and criticism as courage. Ofcourse sometimes like everyone I get depressed and stressed in much distress..like who d hell am I trying 2 impress..forget d beautiful face they don't define nobody. The only tin d world recognize is great potentials and success.. Forget what people say cos their opinion is never gonna be as relevant as ur zeal. Ur critics definitely cant even do half of wat u depict. All they do is sit down and predict..sometimes life's gon feel backwards lik it went in reverse, just hold-on and prove ur in charge of ur own empire with GOD on ur side..i am no quitter and u can call me a go-getter..I'm probably gon fail a couple of times more but I guess that's the best recipe 4my success dish. Forget the mockery, disappointment and dis-approvals. U shouldn't let d day pass by bcos of some unrealistic bunch of filthy opinions. I WILL BE THE BEST IN ANYTHING I DO.

I AM A WOMAN SO WHAT?

I am a woman
So what?

I get into an argument with a man. He slaps me.
I feel the pain.Yet they tell me I provoked him.

I get into an argument with a man. I slap him.
They tell me I have no respect. Like I don't have
the right to be angry...

So, my level of respect for people is judged by
my degree of silence in the face of brutality,
disrespect and most importantly injustice...

Because I am a woman..

So what?
I am not allowed to show anger.
I must sit with my mouth tied,
my legs stretched out even if it hurts.
I must not talk "anyhow"
I must pick my words carefully like am picking beans.

Because I am a woman

My Husband cheats on me,
I am told to tolerate it... to save my marriage
because "its in their nature to cheat"
I cheat, and I am sent packing
with my belongings in a "Ghana must go bag"
on my head and my little one still suckling my left nipple.
Three years later, my little one is tagged a bastard.

Because I am a woman.

I am judged a good girl if i know how to cook,
clean and do laundry for any man.
And when if i don't know how to, they tag me "useless"

I am judged by people
because I am cheerful, always smiling and happy
Because I wear different colors of lipstick and
take pride in looking good and dressing sexy

Because I am a Woman

My character doesn't count
Because I am a woman I must therefore keep silent

He's 31 and runs a company....
Ahh Wonderful! Successful at a very young age
1 am 31 and I run a company
Hmmm, shes not even married.
"My dear, marry as soon as possible o. You don dey old"
Because my life ends at 40...

Because I am a woman
I am not allowed to be a prodigy

Because I am financially buoyant without a rich dude beside me,
Then, I am a generous leg opener.. Chai

Because I am a woman
If I am rapped, it is my fault because the strap of my bra is Pink.
And if I am way younger, I will be flogged because I allowed
the 25year old man next door touch me.
I am bleeding, sore and in pain.. Yet, they force me to admit I enjoyed it

Because I am a Woman

Beacon of Hope

I find it really offensive that a Nigerian would maul the Coat of Arms, replacing the Eagle with a generator.

Even sadder is the fact that many keep sharing it. As much as we joke with everything, some things are sacrosanct, and The Coat of Arms is one of them.

I am disturbed, and I fear for our Nation. If we are truly the leaders of tomorrow, and we are this badly behaved. We desecrate the sacred, we have no regard for anything, nothing is too important to be touched by filth. No sense of occasion or pride or duty whatsoever! 

When you think about the countless sacrifices, from the wars past and present, all in the bid to uphold the integrity of this same Coat of Arms...

You then begin to wonder. Are these the same people who will serve this country and defend her honour? Are these the ones who will make sure the labour of heroes past is not in vain???

Let those who still believe fight and build this great nation. That Eagle will soar high someday. It will rise out of the ashes as a beacon of hope to many, showing the path for others to follow. 

Where will these infidels be then??

A little About me

Dressed in this expensive smile is a lady who's far from perfection.. she's flawed on many areas and have had to be broken many times by life... it's ok to assume she's got it all together because you see her all dressed up, looking dapper, i assume (wink)... whilst your assumptions may be right, it's probably because you've never been close to her, and so, all you see is the image and not the real picture.

There are days she goes broke, there are days she gets really depressed and quickly crawls out, there are days she wonders if she's on the right track, there are days she wonders if she's ever going to be successful even when shes strong and very intelligent "Please allow me blow my trumpet lol", there are days she finds herself struggling with people's opinion of her "but then who care, everyone is entitled to their opinion", there are days she wishes she can go back in time and never met some people "but then this silly mistakes are the reasons we grow to become better people that's if you learn from ur mistakes though"

Those who are close to her know all the baggages she comes with. They understand that she can be extremely annoying yet loving and charming. They understand that sometimes she can be bossy and has zero tolerance to stupidity "yah i know and am seriously working on that", but she's down to earth and able to connect with anyone regardless of their social status.. They understand that whilst she may sometimes have this "I don't care" attitude, her heart is large enough to accommodate anyone despite their differences.. She is a very big dreamer and a big talker " Trust me i can talk for the world when am in the mood. We call that "talkative" "Elejo wewe" )... Always positive and daring.. She moves on easily and never takes life too serious cos at the end of the day only GOD can crown our little efforts Ecc 9:11...

Finally she's obsessed with the color pink "You have no idea mheeen", she loveeeeeees kids, and hope to have 3plets (a boy and two girls) herself even if she never wants to be married. She's SINGLE (and not searching).. She has seen too many unhealthy marriages and relationships and has come to the conclusion that been single whilst you work on every expect of your life is ultimate, been single is a life without unnecessary burden, headache, stress and a life full with so much love, happiness and endless possibilities .. She a child of GOD, Zion's Very own Priceless Jewel.

TIMING

At moments that I felt the least adept, I have known there is a force beneath my wings for which I could take no credit. There was a perfect timing. There was a person I could never have schemed to meet. There was an opportunity I could never have orchestrated on my own.
During times of reflection, most of us are amazed to realize that the greatest moments of our lives happened only through a series of circumstances that we ourselves did not initiate. Think about the serendipitous encounters, the synchronous timing of events, and the chance meetings in your life. Had you not been in that restaurant, school, church, or party you never would have met a business contact, a future spouse or an employer.

You see, timing is everything. The process sometimes can be painful especially when all hell is breaking lose in your life. It is tough work, especially if you lived in Nigeria. Like me, you probably have experienced a time when nothing in your life looks like what you imagined, hoped for, prayed for, planned for and strategize for. ‘Hang in there is frustrating to hear, but that’s what you have to do.
You have to maintain your focus and see what’s not there yet. Don’t let it go. When it seems like all of life is slipping right through your fingers, tighten your imaginative grasp and declare, ‘it’s mine and I’m not letting it get away, no matter what I have to go through.
They say that the mighty oak tree, which can grow up to eighty feet tall and a hundred feet wide is nothing but a nut that refused to give up its ground. Be the nut who won’t give up ground, because every day teaches you something.

My Experience as a Corps Member

Right here, on this ground, was where I lived for three weeks during my NYSC in Ikare Akoko Local Govt, Akure, Ondo State



As horrible as the sight of this picture is (am guessing), it was the best available for corp members at the time. The living condition was gruesome and pathetic, as I had been exposed to a level of comfort prior to my going to Ikare Akoko. I had to take my bath outside at the risk of having a male Corp member walk right pass an open space with no gate or fence.. We had no power. Flies and Mosquitos became my worst nightmare.. My decision to remain in Akure after the 3 Weeks orientation camp was questioned by many, including myself, but I knew it was a decision I would someday look back on and smile even though i was off an on lol. 
 

It was right here, far away from home and everything familiar, that I began to find myself. It was right here that life taught me some valuable lessons.. it was right I had a deeper and broader understanding of diversity; That although we are all different, our stories are somewhat similar...it was right here I saw things that shook my bones and moved me to tears. It was right here that life taught me patience. Right in this premises, I listened to other corp members as they share their heart wrenching life experiences, making me realize that what I consider ''Hell' , is actually someone else's 'Heaven'.
It's easy to see what God was doing in your life once you get to the place He intended. The difficulty lies in seeing by faith what God is doing when you are on your way there. No body likes hard times, but it's the unpleasant experiences that are often the catalyst to build the character required for life.
Stepping into the unfamiliar gave me clarity and guts for the next phase of my life. I'm forever thankful for the amazing people I met in Ikare Okoko, Akure, Ondo State.
‪#‎PricelessExperience‬ ‪#‎BatchC‬ ‪#‎JournalYourJourney‬

#‎Unveiled‬

Everyone is looking for something. Your God's glory will not be seen in the areas of your 'fulness'. It will be revealed in the areas of your frustrations and emptiness. it is not in your luster... it's in your lack.
Whether you are the blessed, rich, successful and Everything is going good on the outside... I bet you somewhere in your life there is something you can't fix to save your life because God want's to give you an equal opportunity to have an encounter with Him... The truth however is, if you could fix it yourself you wouldn't need him... So he puts the things you so desperately need out of your reach so that you have a need for Him in an area you wouldn't have it before.

The deceitfulness of riches....

The deceitfulness of riches is that it keeps moving, and if you are not careful you will chase it all of your life and still feel empty. The person who gives, gives not that they might get more but that what they have doesn’t have them.
The prodigal son got the blessing and left the blessor and the blessing choked him by making him think that if you have your father’s stuff, you don’t need your father.


The person who doesn’t have 'IT' is sowing so that they can get 'IT.' Whilst the person who has 'IT' is sowing so that 'IT' doesn’t have them. So every time God takes you higher, you have to enlarge your capacity to be more generous because if you don’t, the thing He gave you will choke you.

God will take you as high as he can trust you. And the way you keep God's trust is that every time he gives you something you keep casting it down. The giver is always better than the gift.

The Longest Journey Ever Made (My Opinion)

There was a man who made the longest journey that has ever been recorded in history… He traveled the longest distance. Ofcause he didn't go by plane, car, boat, train or even a camel because he didn't have any of that. But he made the longest journey that has ever been recorded in history without ever even moving his feet.


The longest journey ever made was not the journey to the cross, although that was a pretty important journey. It was not the trip to Palestine. It was not Christopher Columbus’s first voyage to America neither was it Apostle Paul going out to some Greek island. The longest trip was not his voice to Rome to confront Caesar. The longest journey that was ever made was not the children of Israel from Egypt to the promise land, although that was a pretty long journey.

The longest most difficult and dangerous trip was made without ever moving his feet at all; it was the prodigal son when the bible says 'He came to himself.' That is the longest journey you will ever make; to come past what’s been put on you until you finally come to terms with yourself and the person God predestined you to become.

Friendship: "A Sacred Commodity"

One of the greatest lessons of this year for me was the need to cultivate good friendships. While I can say I love people, I had always been indifferent as to whether people stayed or left. This year though, I’ve learned the power that comes with good vibes and positive energy. If I have a good feeling being around someone or some people or I just feel that the energy in a place is good, I stay there. My friends have been my cheerleaders, support system, critics, and God’s gift to me.

I also met a couple of beautiful people last year and I tried my best to stay in touch, but then again, some people are drifters. I remember praying that I’d have really good friends and meet people with love in their hearts and souls. God answered. I think it’s safe to say that I have friends for a lifetime,
I like to think that I’m not such a difficult person to deal with. However, I’ve come to the realization that people can switch on you any moment. They will leave you once they feel they've gotten all you possibly can offer. You don’t even have to do anything to deserve this treatment. In the same way, people will see you and just hate everything about you- your smile, the way you chew, the way you laugh, even the fact that you exist. I have a lot of them around.
What I learned this year was that as long as I kept my conscience clear before God and didn’t harbor any ill-feelings towards anyone, irrespective of what they did, or my own mistakes God always looked (looks) out for me.
Friendship is a sacred commodity. It is to be revered and cherished for a life time.. This year was about making new friends and strengthening the bond of already existing ones.. I made mistakes here and there, but my mistakes were my lessons.
Cheers to every friend out there who made life beautiful for me despite my imperfections.

THE DEAL

In August 2015 i decided to relocate to Houston. My agent found me a great deal on one of the airlines (Emirate to be precise)which I shared with one of my friends who's widely traveled. But he gave me a surprising advice. He told me not to buy it. He could hear in my voice that I was trying to convince myself that the deal was great. The only problem was I was going to end up flying for about two days for a trip that was supposed to be 12 hours. of course my time was more important than the great discount.

Focusing on the money and ignoring d fact that the deal didn't feel all that comfortable was the source of hesitation my friend picked up on. In d end I opted not 2 buy it cos my feelings were too strong 2 ignore. I would have acted solely on the finances and ignored other, internal factors, such as the unhappiness of staying too long on a flight.
We often make decisions, weather it's taking a job, or entering into a relationship because they look good on paper. We have all dated someone who had all the characteristics we look 4 in a mate. But no matter how great potential partners may look and act, if we don't feel a deep connection to them as people, then no matter how great their characteristics line up on paper, the relationship is doomed.
Our pursuit of success sometimes causes us to lose touch with what's at the core of why we are working so hard in d first place. D singular quest to attain a high level of success is often d reason many people 4get 2 place d same emphasis on whats in their soul and heart.
I'm not suggesting that anything is wrong with pursing goals, financials or otherwise. Take pleasure in the deal. just be careful not to get caught up in the belief that the only measure of success is money. Pursue what nurtures your inner life. Whether you are a small business owner or an employee, make time for the things that bring you joy.

Take a break….You Are A Limited Resource.

It's amazing how that we live in a world where everyone thinks you are a super (wo)man and as such they expect you to come to their aid whenever they need you, never realizing that you are a (wo)man of like passions who has stuff to deal with and bills to pay..
Such individuals often time prey on your vulnerability. They demand unlimited access into your life in order to keep feeding off of the breast milk of your soul. They are hooked on being your patient. They are addicted to your attention but never taking your advise. They are like patients who come to see you but won’t take your prescription. They just want to take up your time with their predicament. And the sad thing is you are always somebody else’s doctor, secretly wondering when is somebody going to medicate you.

I have come to realize, in my short time on earth, that when people see you as strong and mighty, they seldom feed you. Rather they feed on you. They see you as such a HERO. And sometimes we get out of balance because we are better at being there for other people than we are at allowing them be there for us. We have not be trained to open up, to being fed, so we are constantly being fed upon.
My experience has however taught me that in order to strike a balance, you have to be attracted to relationships where you are not the biggest or smartest one in the room. You have to be ok with being subordinate because you can’t be fed when you are addicted to being in control. To surround yourself with people who feed you is what makes you available for the people who need you.
Realizing you are a limited resource will help you prioritize your relationships. In the end you have to strike a balance. You are important too.

IMPULSE BUYERS

They spend money without focus.They are often times broke by happenstance. Money without focus will cause you to end up in poverty..Spending without structure and strategy will deplete your savings. If you don't have a plan and a structure to your money you would lose things that you could have had because you had no focus.
Having no focus is a terrible thing. Almost as bad as 'no focus' is 'wrong focus.' You must realize that you are eating the fruits today of yesterday's focus.. What you slay in your 20s you will eat in your 50s. Be careful what you slay. If you slay nothing in your 20s you will starve in your 50s. Be responsible with your money.

GOD IS STILL IN THE BUSINESS OF RE-WRITING STORIES

Over the last 8 years of my life, I have been privileged to interact with different kinds of people. People from various walks of life have sat before me, as they explained in detail, the various intricacies of their situations or plights. And whenever I find myself in such situations where I am the one giving the advice, I am humbled, knowing how far I am from perfection.
The diversity of our lifestyle has never ceased to amaze me. The plethora of circumstances that unfold as people tell their stories, would give Nollywood movie writers an endless source of materials for film. These accounts are sometimes tragic and sometimes comical; they can be shocking or border on the eerie. Regardless of the nature of the circumstances, I am reminded that these are the stories of real people, searching for real solutions to real problems.
When people ask for my counsel on certain issue, there is a sense of helplessness I feel when I am face to face with these people, whose eyes plead for an answer that is not known or an assurance that cannot be given. I have been asked if God will provide the money needed to pay the tuition before they are kicked out of school, if a terrible situation would turn around or if a spouse would come back. The truth is, I really did not know. These are the instances that truly test our faith. Walking with God will often take us from the realm of the difficult into the realm of the ludicrous; when the promise sounds so farfetched that it becomes laughable.
We all have moments when we conclude a certain situation will not change. This is seldom because the change is no longer desired. It has more to do with the fact that the time frame, within which the change made sense has long since expired. As a matter of fact our faith is greatly challenged when the things God intends to do in us, or through you, has no precedent.
As humans, whenever we’re faced with a difficult situation, there is great consolation to be found in the knowledge that somebody has been through it before, and lived to tell the tale. We seek solace in the voices of those connected to us; voices that tell us all will be well. We have the propensity to require people to act as a sounding board for the things God intends to do in our lives especially when what God has proposed to do in our lives has no reference point.
However, such was not the case for a man called Abraham when God gave him a promise. He had no such consolation. And the sad thing about having no template is that there is very little to emulate.
As Abraham gathers himself in the winter of his life, he is putting the final touches to his memoirs. He has his regrets and he has his highlights, but he has lain to rest the matter of a child. He has after all, lived a good life. For God to attempt to reopen this issue, at this stage, is humorous at the very least. But the fascinating thing about God is that He has a way of revisiting issues, long after they have been interred.
When we have attended the funeral of our hopes, the thought of resurrection is amusing. When the world has stood with you at the graveside of your dreams, and consoled you as the final wreath was laid, talk of resurrection is ridiculous. It is such that, even when we try to believe the impossible, the mocking laughter of our friends and even our own laughter intimidates us from standing firm on the promise. In all of this God is not deterred. The importance of our destiny is so great that God may bypass our inability to believe, and fulfil the promise inspite of us.
God is still in the business of re-writing stories.

GOING UP OR DOWN?

Many of the little incidents that occur in a normal day could actually teach us a lot about life. A common occurrence in any hotel or business place is the wait for an elevator. When you are on the ground floor it is quite straight forward, as all the elevators are going in one direction; up. If you happen to be on one of the middle floors however, not every elevator that comes along is the right one for you.
I have had to endure the excruciating frustration of taking an elevator ride that took me several floors in the wrong direction, before finally moving in the direction that was right for me. In recent time, before I step into an elevator, I always ask “Going up or down?” because I realize even though an elevator might be going up, the way forward for you, might be down.

We live in a time which presents us with an overwhelming pressure to get ahead. The competition is fierce and the vacancies that represent that elusive state called ‘success’ seem fewer than the competitors. This tempts many of us to adopt a policy of grabbing any and everything that has the semblance of upward mobility.
It is true that we all aspire to move up in life, but like getting on an elevator, not everything that appears to move up, will take you where you are going. Life will often require of us, the patience and character to ask the question “going up?” before we decide to connect with anything. The way forward for you may require that you take the elevator going down.